I have read a lot of articles regarding the horrible ideas about being forced to expose trauma details for your t, although I am hoping this is simply not completely ridiculous. I am dealing with the other.
I've many 'troubles' that I am conscious of from an emotionally/verbally abusive stepfather to a grownup that I trusted in high-school as being a maternal figure that showed she'd different tips for that connection... Then what's daily becoming more of a conviction that I've repressed very early neglect (I have always had dangers but am not experiencing his and my speech in my own brain and it isn't nice change of words)... I have NEVER told details of some of this stuff. I've stated to two people who "something" occurred with this particular person I respected and that was the extent. Pictures, small movie in my own mind of the ones I recall now these sounds of what I suppose plague me.
Does this sound right to EVERYONE? I understand I would be HIGHLY embaressed to say the things that I expect it'snot anything ill making me wish and I'd need to to... But I'm worried we'll spend years tiptoeing across the specifics because he thinks I'm afraid and that I am desperately wanting to spill the beans. I wish I can tell him this, but it is not allowed.
I also have found that I am unable to tell him ANYTHING if he doesn't ask directly and am working together with a t. I've told him this and he is proficient at trying to ask I want to talk, but cannot me questions. The problem is, I can also not tell him what to ask. I know it might appear absolutely mad, but it is like I am prohibited to just freely tell things but I am permitted to answer honestly. He has gone back and forth about 'control' trauma and then I think I am so quiet about things happening that he does not believe they are and begins to consider we must get another direction. I get so angry once I hear him discuss not addressing the trauma especially and obtain extremely frustrated and want to quit hope about ever getting relief. It's like I AM AWARE I have to get out these details but I cannot tell him that. I think he is also concerned I can't manage coping with the injury directly because of my panic disorder, but I don't understand how to alter any one of this. He covers stress that you can and wanting to get it done with as small detail and I have learn about all these new methods to take care of PTSD without detailed processing, but I would like it so bad.